How to Talk About Concussion Symptoms: Better Questions, Better Understanding

An Midwest Minute: In Writing | Midwest Concussion Clinic

“But you were fine yesterday.”

It’s a sentence that many people recovering from a concussion have heard.

And sometimes, it’s a reasonable observation.

Yesterday, you went to work. You spent time with your family. You went grocery shopping. Maybe you even felt pretty good.

Today, you’re struggling to concentrate, feeling overwhelmed by noise, or having difficulty completing something that seemed easy yesterday.

The person supporting you is confused.

And here’s the part that often gets overlooked:

You might be just as confused as they are.

You don’t necessarily understand why yesterday went well and today feels difficult.

That’s where communication becomes so important.

Not because someone needs to defend how they’re feeling.

But because understanding what’s happening gives us a better opportunity to figure out what to do next.

Why Concussion Symptoms Can Be Difficult to Explain

Concussion recovery isn’t always a straight line.

Your ability to tolerate different activities may change depending on sleep, stress, physical activity, cognitive demands, environmental stimulation, and other factors.

Even the same activity can place different demands on you from one day to the next.

Think about grocery shopping.

One trip might involve a quiet store, a short shopping list, and relatively little activity beforehand.

Another might involve crowded aisles, bright lights, background music, conversations, a longer shopping list, and a day that’s already been mentally exhausting.

Both experiences are called grocery shopping.

But they aren’t necessarily the same experience for your brain.

This is why asking someone whether they could do something yesterday doesn’t always tell us whether they can comfortably do it today.

What matters is understanding the demands of the activity and how the person responded.

Start by Describing the Experience, Not Just the Symptom

One of the challenges I see in concussion care is how difficult it can be for patients to explain what they’re experiencing.

Someone might say:

“My brain feels weird.”

“I’m exhausted.”

“I just can’t concentrate.”

Those statements are valid. They’re descriptions of real experiences.

But they don’t always give us enough information to understand what is actually difficult.

Instead, I encourage patients to think about three things.

1. What am I experiencing?

Start with what you notice.

Maybe you’re having trouble following conversations, feeling mentally fatigued, or becoming overwhelmed in busy environments.

You don’t need to use perfect medical terminology.

2. How is it affecting me?

Now connect that experience to something specific.

Instead of only saying, “I can’t concentrate,” you might explain:

“I was trying to follow a conversation at dinner, but when multiple people started talking, I couldn’t keep up.”

That gives us a clearer picture of the challenge.

3. What would help?

This is where communication becomes actionable.

Maybe you need a quieter environment, fewer simultaneous demands, a short break, or additional time to complete something.

You may not know exactly what will help yet.

That’s okay, too.

The goal is to begin identifying possibilities rather than feeling pressured to have every answer.

For Supporters: Listening Is More Than Waiting to Respond

If you’re supporting someone recovering from a concussion, it’s natural to want to help.

You want to find a solution.

You want to make things better.

Sometimes, though, the most useful thing you can do is resist the urge to immediately fix the problem.

Start by listening.

Let the person finish explaining.

And instead of assuming you understand what they mean, ask a question that helps clarify their experience.

You don’t need to become a concussion expert.

You need to become curious about what the person is experiencing.

Five Questions That Can Change the Conversation

These are five questions I encourage people to consider when trying to understand a difficult experience.

1. “What was the hardest part?”

This question helps identify the functional challenge.

Imagine someone says they struggled at the grocery store.

Was it remembering what they needed?

Walking through the aisles?

Looking between shelves?

The noise?

The amount of time they spent shopping?

Each answer gives us different information.

Rather than assuming the entire activity was the problem, we can begin identifying which demands were most difficult.

2. “When did it become difficult?”

Timing can provide useful context.

Did the activity feel difficult immediately?

Did things become harder after 15 minutes?

Was the person comfortable during the activity but exhausted afterward?

These are different experiences.

Understanding when the difficulty appeared may help us recognize patterns related to duration, cumulative demands, or the circumstances surrounding the activity.

Timing alone doesn’t tell us the cause, but it can help guide the next question.

3. “Which part was difficult?”

This sounds similar to asking what was hardest, but it serves a slightly different purpose.

“What was the hardest part?” helps prioritize the biggest challenge.

“Which part was difficult?” helps break an activity into its individual components.

For example, someone might say:

“I had trouble working on my computer.”

Was the challenge reading?

Switching between applications?

Remembering instructions?

Following a video meeting?

Keeping up with multiple tasks?

The more precisely we understand the difficulty, the better we can consider possible adjustments.

4. “What was different today?”

This question is particularly useful when someone has good days and difficult days.

Instead of treating yesterday’s success as evidence that today’s difficulty shouldn’t exist, get curious about what changed.

How did they sleep?

What had they already done that day?

Was the environment different?

Were they under more stress?

Did the activity last longer?

Sometimes, the answer will be obvious.

Other times, it won’t.

The goal isn’t to find someone or something to blame. It’s to understand the context.

5. “What would make this easier?”

This is where understanding becomes collaboration.

Maybe the person needs a break.

Maybe they need fewer distractions.

Maybe they want help completing a particular part of the activity.

Or maybe they simply need someone to listen without offering an immediate solution.

The important part is asking rather than assuming.

Support is most useful when it responds to the person’s actual needs.

Better Questions Can Lead to Better Decisions

Let’s return to our grocery shopping example.

A patient says:

“I couldn’t handle the store today.”

Instead of responding, “But you went last week,” consider a different conversation.

“What was the hardest part?”

“The lights and trying to find everything.”

“When did it become difficult?”

“About halfway through.”

“Which part was difficult?”

“Looking back and forth between the shelves and my list while people were walking around me.”

“What was different today?”

“The store was much busier, and I’d already worked all morning.”

“What would make this easier?”

“Maybe going at a quieter time and getting fewer things.”

Now we have something useful.

We haven’t diagnosed the cause of the symptoms.

We haven’t magically solved the problem.

But we’ve learned enough to consider a practical adjustment and identify information worth discussing with the patient’s healthcare professional.

That’s progress.

Communication Is Part of Concussion Care

One of the things I believe strongly at Midwest Concussion Clinic is that we have to understand the problem before we can effectively treat it.

That understanding doesn’t come from a symptom checklist alone.

It comes from conversations.

From asking questions.

From listening to the answers.

From recognizing that the same symptom can affect different people in very different ways.

And from understanding that the people supporting someone through recovery may need guidance, too.

A patient shouldn’t have to perfectly explain every experience to deserve support.

And a supporter shouldn’t be expected to understand everything immediately.

Both people can learn how to communicate more effectively.

Start With Curiosity

The next time someone says they’re struggling with something that seemed manageable yesterday, try replacing the assumption with a question.

“What was different today?”

“What was the hardest part?”

“What would make this easier?”

You may not have the answer immediately.

But you’ll have a better place to start.

Because better care begins with understanding.

And sometimes, understanding begins with one better question.
Midwest Concussion Clinic

Making the Invisible Visible.

Put These Conversations Into Practice

Understanding how to communicate about concussion symptoms is one thing. Knowing what to say when you’re struggling to explain what you’re experiencing can be another.

That’s why Midwest Concussion Clinic created the Free Family Communication Checklist.

This resource helps patients explain what they’re experiencing, identify what they need, and gives family members and supporters practical ways to listen, respond, and offer support.

Download the Free Family Communication Checklist

Better conversations begin with better understanding.